Feeling like a failure with my fitness goal today

Today I set out to improve my time on the 4.5 mile jog I've been doing every couple days. On day 1, I started with walking 1 min then jogging 1 min. I did that a few times and then increased to walking 1 min and jogging 2 min. When I did this I improved my time by close to 10 min!!

Today my goals was to run 3 min and walk 1 min. I didn't have a set amount of time in mind but my goal was to just do better than my previous time. I didn't hit my goal at all. In fact, I almost talked myself out of going in the first place. It was super overcast when I left the house so I told myself it might rain and I didn't want to get caught in the rain. I loaded up the baby and went anyway. I was trying to pump myself up even though my body was super tired and sore. I did my 4 min brisk walk for a warm up then started running. I did two rounds of the 3 min run and was feeling SO tired! My entire body felt tired.

Do I turn around and go back home or keep going? Feeling like a failure but not wanting to give up I pushed on. I knew I wouldn't be able to continue with my run but decided to not give in to my head telling me I couldn't do it and just decided to walk. I listened to my body and knew I could walk. I was a little nervous I wouldn't make it home in time to go get my daughter from school...

During my walk I changed my thoughts of feeling like a failure and just cleared my head. I was listening to our Team Beachbody National Wake Up Calls and started feeling inspired. I was able to listen to 2 calls instead of the 1 I usually get in. I suddenly became VERY inspired by what I was hearing from other successful coaches. I was excited to come home and share my sense of failure with you. I started to think back to why I wanted to join this amazing company. To help others just like myself. To hopefully inspire someone else. To help financially support my family. To better myself and my family's health. I also started building my dream team list of friends that I think may be interested in this same opportunity!!

Moral of the story: It's ok to slow down. Don't give in to your "stinkin' thinkin' " and just do what feels right. My walk only took my 5 min longer than my first walk/jog. I had plenty of time to sit down and write this blog before picking my daughter up on time too. The overcast skies made for a much pleasurable walk. The baby got in an hour BONUS nap! I cleared my head! Came up with a game plan! AND... Changed my outlook on my day!

How Do You Do It All?!?

Lately I've been asked, "How do you do it all?"

My answer- I don't!

I have learned after 3 kids to let some things go. My husband might wish I wasn't SUCH a believer in this phrase but I just like to remind him "our house is a lived in house with 3 kids under 7" :)

I am SO thankful for him loving me through my mess and also for his love of cleaning or at least a love of a clean house! I do love a clean house but it is not top of my priority list anymore. I mean we DO NOT live in filth but toys all over the house and clean laundry piled up- I'm guilty!

(hey, at least the laundry room is clean:)

My priorities-

My Family and everything that falls into that category - keeping them fed and happy and clean and healthy and learning and loving and active and engaged and.... does it stop??....

My own mental and physical health and well being which includes daily reading, eating clean and exercise for at least 30 min a day!

My struggles:

 I don't really like to read, getting to bed at a decent time, keeping the house clean (SO thankful for a man who doesn't mind cleaning and who does SO much of it!) getting my booty out of bed in the morning, and folding laundry

So, how do I do it all? I don't. :) And I'm not ashamed of it! I want to invest my time into things I know matter, the rest will get taken care of and I just don't stress about it anymore. I've got plenty to stress about and stay busy with.

Wondering how you can fit fitness in your life?

Think eating healthy cost too much?

 

Try going to bed 30 min earlier and in return getting up 30 min earlier to fit a quick workout in. Get your workout in after the kids go to bed and right before your shower. Workout when you get home from school and invite your kids to join. We live by example after all! Try to incorporate that into your weekly routine at least 3 days a week for starters and see how it makes you feel! Feel like healthy eating hurts your wallet? Look at the junk food in your pantry- how much did it all cost. Add that to how much money you spend in a week eating out. Think about how many healthy meals you could feed yourself and family for the same cost. If you don't buy the junk food, you won't be tempted to eat it. At SAMs and Costco you can buy about 7 bananas for $1.50 maybe??? Where else can you buy 7 healthy snacks for $1.50? A little planning and prep work goes a long way.

YOU can do this! 

Want more info or want to chat?
Shoot me a message on FB: www.facebook.com/emckendree or email me: emilymckendree@gmail.com

Transformation Tuesday

Here I am everyone in all my glory. No makeup, greasy hair, few clothes and pale skin that blends in with the walls :) That's ok though because I am proud of my results and wanted to share them with you!!

 

21 days ago a made a commitment to myself to start eating cleaner, making sure I exercised every day and to take a little time for myself everyday. Enter the 21 day fix challenge! I got with my Beachbody coach and we found the program that suited me needs best and I jumped ALL in (like joined as a coach and all because I knew this was something I believed in).

 

Here I am 21 days later.

My results aren't super easy to see in these pictures as they were taken on my phone and a few of them were taken by my 7 year old but I think you can get the picture.

 

My main goal was to define my abs. I did not go into this with the goal of losing weight. I knew that would be a bonus but I was at a fairly comfortable weight. If anything I wanted to drop 3 lbs. I did that and even more!!

 

I defined my abs! (I still have work to do to get them where I want them but for 21 days- I'm very proud of myself!) I lost 5 lbs! WHOA! That was a pleasant surprise. I don't recommend you to stand on the scale every day. It can be so discouraging. Get on it when you start and when you finish. If you need a little more boost try to limit yourself to once a week at least.

I lost the muffin top and the bloat! Whoop whoop! I have always been thin and haven't struggled with weight but I've learned to be toned it takes lots of HARD work and commitment. The change in my eating habits was the hardest. I've  tried to avoid fast food but if we eat out I just chose carefully. You can find a healthy option most anywhere. I also cut back on my ice cream. That was tough as I usually eat a LARGE serving every night. I knew that to get results 70-80% depended on nutrition and the rest had to do with the exercise. I could work my tail off but if I didn't change what I put into my body the results were probably not going to come. My tricks- don't buy the junk. If you don't buy it, you won't eat it. If it is there already- throw it out. Your family can benefit from your lifestyle changes too. After all- who doesn't want a healthy family.

My other trick, SHAKEOLOGY! I'll admit, I was a skeptic to try it at first. I mean look at the price! I did some research, tried some samples and decided to give it a go. The vanilla flavor sold me! I add PB and a banana with a little coconut water, milk and ice and I was hooked. It was like a smooth, creamy milkshake! It took the place of my nightly ice cream :) and served the craving well. I started drinking it in the mid afternoons to get me through until dinner. It is very filling and often times used as a meal replacement. If you have more weight to lose, I strongly recommend using it inn place of a meal. At $4 a serving it's cheaper than eating out for breakfast or lunch! It helped with my regularity so much so that I know when I am going to GO everyday. And who doesn't want to go EVERYDAY?? I sure do!

Another improvement was my skin! I have dealt with acne since my teenage years. I have been on Accutane 3 times and tried numerous over the counter remidies with verying results. After having children and horomones all over the place my skin still looks like a teenagers. (no not wrinkle free but scared and with pimples). I have noticed a decrease in the number of breakouts I have and that they are healing faster when I do get them. Also, the redness is decreasing too. I still have a ways to go with my skin but this change is only a result of adding Shakeology and clean eating to my diet. I have done nothing different. I am very excited to try the Rodan & Fields skin care line that my friend, Lori Lansford introduced me to! I'm just waiting on it to come in the mail! I hope with all these changes, I will have glowing, blemish free skin SOON!

So what are you waiting for??

Be the change you want to be!

Do something for yourself today!

It only took me 30 min a day of exercise and cleaning up my eating habits!

No deprivation and no diet!

Just smart choices!!

 

I'm excited to watch for your transformation Tuesday pics!

Let me know how I can help YOU reach your health and fitness goals!!!

XOXO

 

Camu Camu

I've been drinking Shakeology now for about a month and am starting to notice some differences in the way I feel. I have been drinking it most often in the early afternoon and can't believe how satisfying it is. Usually I need a snack or two or three to get me through the afterschool hump and on until dinner. I have also had it for breakfast a few mornings in the rush out the door. Those mornings I am so surprised at how NOT STARVING I am by lunch time!

This may be TMI for some but it should be shared. When it comes to regularity- I have NO problems there. It's nice to know I will go everyday. There is nothing worse than not being able to go.

Now that we've covered that... MY SKIN. I have had issues with acne ever since high school. I was on Accutane 3 times (a very potent acne drug that required regular blood checks and can have some negative effects on the body) and have tried many other skin care regimens with little help. Now, I have not seen a complete clearing in my skin as I have only been drinking this for roughly 1 month, but my skin has cleared dramatically. I feel the breakouts have become less and are healing quicker when I do get them. It's crazy what putting good things into your body will do for your exterior.

I should add that Shakeology is the only difference I've made to my daily routine in the past month when it comes to the areas I listed above.

I decided I wanted to share some research on the super food ingredients in Shakeology. Today I looked up Camu-Camu. After visiting several websites I found some great info on this super food found in the rainforests of South America.

Highest source of natural vitamin C
Powerful anit-inflammatory
May help to prevent cancer as it is a powerful defense against free radicals
Promotes eye health as it is an all around support for the nervous system
Improves mood and cognitive balance
Improves muscle tone
Supports a healthy reproductive system
Boosts the immune system
Helps prevent viral bacterial infections
Supports healthy collagen, ligaments and tendons

The most exciting finding for me was this:

Guards against degenerative brain disease. Included in the nervous system category is the brain, which also derives benefits from camu camu. Not only does the fruit help improve focus and prevent "brain fog," but camu camu can also help block the buildup of plaque in the brain that can lead to conditions like Alzheimer's disease

Ever since my Granny passed away a few years ago, my mom and I make jokes when we have a forgetful moment. I know it's not a joke but more a fear that many of us have about living a life with Alzheimer's disease. Especially after watching someone you love suffer from Alzheimer's or some form of dementia. I'm excited to say my mom is trying Shakeology along with her nightly glass of red wine!

Stay tuned for more info on the awesome superfood ingredients in Shakeology. Give me feedback on any one in particular you want me to look into. Thanks for reading!!

Learn more: 
Shakeology.com/emilymckendree
 http://www.naturalnews.com/042178_camu_health_benefits_natural_superfoods.html#ixzz3X7huuBqa
camucamu.org

Easter

As I started to look up blog sites I remembered I had created a blog several years ago when my oldest child was just a baby. I thought I'd look for it and BAM! there it was. I have recently joined the Beach Body team as a coach and am so excited for the opportunity to help people in an area I am so passionate about. I'm learning that a big factor in being a coach is personal development. It makes SO much sense! I mean how can I help people better themselves if I'm not willing to help myself be better. Not just physically or nutritionally, but mentally as well. This got me thinking about my past year and all the challenges I have been faced with.

 In March, 2014 I finally admitted to myself and my husband that my marriage was in a crisis. I did everything I knew to do- sought out counseling for myself, begged for marriage counseling (FAIL) and talked about it with my best friend. In counseling I remember saying "I just want him to be the miracle and be able to change!" Eventually I was talking about it to more than my friend and I had to get my parents involved because I needed help. In May my husband left VA and moved to central FL with his job and I made the decision not to follow him. The children and I stayed in VA to finish out the school year and with the help of my brother in law and father we made it to my parent's house on Father's Day, two days after the last day of school. I had a job interview the next week and started a new job I was already specialized in as an RN by July. I enrolled the children in daycare and started my job. My husband kept asking me not to get a job, and telling me things would change and how can we work on things if you aren't with me - but all I heard was BLAH BLAH BLAH. After the decision to start a new job I made the decision to enroll my daughter in school in my home town. This meant we would not be going to be with my husband at the beginning of the school year. To say the least, it was the summer from hell for me. You see- in my mind I knew exactly what KYLE had to do to make our marriage work. HE had screwed up SO much and HE did this to us! Couldn't he see that??

I started visiting my mom's church and I am so thankful for that. She is Catholic and although I was raised in the Methodist church I felt so comforted every time I went to church with her. My 2 youngest were in daycare here and I always saw a familiar face. I often got puzzled looks by lifelong friends who I knew were wondering where Kyle was and some that maybe knew a little about what was going on in my personal life. I was not ME! I had become this empty shell of a person just trying to survive each day, trying to get through until the next day. I was never diagnosed as depressed but I know I was in a deep funk. Work was an escape for me but even there I was not performing at the level I needed to be for my own standards. I had all these personal standards and I just found it so hard to even get up in the morning. I had 3 children depending on me. One- an infant son that I was breastfeeding even that truly needed ME. By September I found myself missing my husband- even the bad parts of him. I was lonely, needed help and wanted to be loved. We made a deal and set all these rules. Basically there was no room for him to screw up but I knew he could do it and I knew his little problem that turned into a big problem was the ONLY problem. With that fixed, so I thought, EVERYTHING would be A-OK! WRONG!!

We made it through the month of September unscathed. Then come a terrible weekend in October when, you guessed it, he broke one of the "rules" BIG TIME!!! I was officially done! No going back this time. I mean I gave him ONE MORE CHANCE and he SCREWED it up AGAIN!!! After this incident in October I heeded the advice of a professional and found myself in a support group full of people just like me. I couldn't believe it. The first time I stepped through the doors and saw all these "normal" people, even some people I knew, I just broke down and cried! Their stories were just like mine! Some had remarried, some had stuck it out and some were single and happy. I knew I'd find all my answers there. WRONG AGAIN!! They did recommend some books for me to read and that's what I did every night. I was searching for answers. As soon as I got the kids to bed I would read until I fell asleep and slowly I started to feel a little stronger. Eventually, I had things happen to me and I felt like God was telling me exactly what I needed to do. I took his direction and went to a job interview in VA where some of my family lives and just knew this was the answer to my prayers. See I was praying for God to separate Kyle and I by distance to make this divorce he kept telling me we needed easier. I'd say "please move him to Boston or Missouri or let me get this job in VA." Everything lined up, my resume sounded like I would be the perfect match for this position, there would be a sign on bonus, I would have a house to live in that I could afford without his help, my parents were going to be retiring up there around the same time. Perfect, RIGHT??

I remember the day all this fell into place saying, "God just told me what to do." Now I look at it differently but I do still feel He was telling me to do these things but for a different outcome than I had planned. When I got to VA, it was Thanksgiving, $#!* hit the fan! To put it nicely, my parents decided FL was their home and would always be. I knew I could not make this move alone, with my three kids and no support system. I had talked so negatively about my husband that no one trusted what would go on if he was around! So MY plan failed AGAIN! I remember telling my mom as she was crying to me telling me she was so sorry (she knew how I was looking at this opportunity for me and my kids to start fresh) and I just told her "Mom, I will be ok. We will all be OK. I'm not sure what God's plan is for me anymore or what He is up to but we will be ok." I had some peace in that but came home with no plan. I'm a planner so NO plan is not cool.

I got through my son's first birthday and the holidays came. I was dreading them because I knew Kyle would be home and I would have to see him and share the kids with him and I just felt like he didn't deserve that after everything He had done to ME and that my kids deserved more. After my PLAN on moving to VA fell through I stopped reading as much and started to feel more disconnected with the stronger person I was becoming. I was still going to church with my mom and would pray the whole time I was there. But I was still being very specific to ask for my needs to be fulfilled. Christmas hit and ALL 3 kids and I got a wicked stomach bug. My parents helped nurse us back to health but then when I went down, guess who came to help ME take care of our kids? Kyle! My husband that I was thinking about divorcing. (Ouch! That word hurts! NEVER use that word loosely people! I hope you never get to that point in your marriage.) I remember saying to him something like "you probably wished this to happen to me" and he kissed me on the forehead and said "I love you". I mean WTH?? WHAAT?? I felt HORRIBLE from that virus but got some peace in those words from the man that I used to love but really never stopped loving. After I got to feeling better I shared with him about the most loving "swift kick in the @$$" I got from my parent's. It was time I figure my crap out. I was sucking as a mom, my kids needed me and their dad to be the best parent's we could be. I was falling apart but yet I was still trying to control everything. I was scared to tell everyone who had help me build up this barrier to keep Kyle out that I still loved him, that I really thought he had changed and that I wanted to work on things with him. I mean no one wants to see a marriage fail but I feel like EVERYONE knew all the drama. That's when I said (actually God was telling me, I'm sure), ok, enough is enough. Follow your heart. Those who matter don't mind and those who mind don't matter. It is true, really! I told Kyle how I was feeling, well I tried. Everytime I tried to talk to him I sobbed. He would look at me like WTH is wrong with you. I had put on this strong front in front of him for months that I was unphased by all of this and that I was stronger than ever. I really was so broken inside just wanting my family back and wanting to love and be loved by him.

A month after that dreaded, but life saving, stomach bug, my children and I moved yet again to be with my husband.

You see, God was working in my life that entire time even though I did not recognize it. I don't really remember asking HIM "why me?" but I always knew he wanted more for me than to be as miserable as I was. All these trials set me up for this miracle. Had I not let him go last May without me and the kids, maybe he wouldn't have seen the problems I'd been bringing to his attention. Had God answered my many prayers to do this and do that I could be in VA working a job with crazy hours and be totally exhausted that I wouldn't have the time to be the mom I want to be. This move would have also led to a divorce and we all know what that does. Had I not gotten that stomach bug over Christmas, I would have never heard Kyle tell me he loves me and get that kiss from him. Had my mom not set me down and tell me to basically put on my big girl panties and figure my crap out (thanks mom :) I wouldn't have gone to Kyle crying multiple times before I finally told him I loved him too and could see he was changing. I hoped he could see I was changing too. For I finally admitted I wasn't perfect in all this. I learned what true forgiveness was all about. I was willing to actually forgive and forget and move forward with our life together.

I've been reading "You're Made for a God-Sized Dream". A book my neighbor recommended after she heard my story. Something I read in it spoke to me. "God sized dreams are invincible when we're obedient. He always wins in the end."   My God sized dream was for my husband to change and my family to be a happy healthy unit again. God's plan was so much more than mine and I did get my miracle in the end! I think even better than the miracle I imagined. With Easter just passed, the story of Jesus' suffering for me and you is fresh on my mind! I mean he died on that cross for ME! He wants me! I feel all these trials lead me closer to Him. I ask myself, how can I use my experience to glorify him? How can I help someone else going through something similar to me? How can I reach people with my story? I have always been a Christian but never felt comfortable enough to talk about my faith with many people. I have delivered 3 miracles- my beautiful children but now I can say I've lived through a very tough trial and got the most beautiful thing at the end of it. I know God puts us in certain places at certain times. I feel he used these hardships to bring me closer to him. I went to God only after I admitted I couldn't do it alone. I'm so thankful for his faithfulness and unconditional love. I also believe he puts different people in our lives at just the right time. Currently, my neighbor in particular. She introduced me to the Beachbody family. God wants me to us my gifts he has given to glorify him. I know I have so much to offer others struggling through the same things I have been through. I know the importance of good nutrition and exercise and how much they can help a person who is depressed. I've been that person, a few times, and when I'm at my worst I am not eating well and not taking care of myself. Most importantly, I know how much personal development can change your life. It saved mine! and brought my husband and I closer to God. I'm so thankful!

Thank you for reading my first chapter book ;) Many of you prayed for me and my family during this tough year, thank you for that. Many of you may not have had any idea we went through this, I'm happy to share. :) Remember to Thank God for all the blessings in your life. How can you use your gifts to help others? Please reach out to me if I can help you in anyway. I'd be happy to chat.

Emilymckendree@gmail.com